笑話是內(nèi)容豐富并具有出乎意料結(jié)尾的幽默口頭故事。笑話幾乎涵蓋人們生活的所有領(lǐng)域,其中包括政治笑話、經(jīng)濟(jì)笑話、家庭生活笑話、關(guān)于民族性格的笑話等。小編精心收集了簡短幽默雙人英語小短文，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇1

　　A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. 一個胖子和一個瘦子在爭論誰更有禮貌。

　　The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. 瘦子說他更有禮貌，因?yàn)樗?jīng)常對女士摘帽示意。

　　But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.但是胖子認(rèn)為他更有風(fēng)度，因?yàn)闊o論什么時候他在車上給別人讓座時，總有兩位女士能坐下。

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇2

　　Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."

　　我在郵局上班，對于顧客們的各種情緒早已習(xí)以為常了。所以，有一天當(dāng)一個生氣的顧客氣沖沖地來到我的工作臺時，我還是非常平靜地問她，“有什么問題嗎?”“我早上上街了，”女顧客說，“我回到家的時候，我看到一個卡片，卡片說郵遞員要給我們家送包裹，但沒人在家?？墒俏业恼煞蛘麄€早上都在家啊。他說他什么都沒聽到”。在表示了歉意之后，我把包裹給了她。“噢，太好了”，那位女顧客喜形于色。“我們等這東西都等多少年了!”“是什么好東西?”我問。“我丈夫的新助聽器”。

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇3

　　The fine-furniture store where I work has been in business since the 1920s. Recently I received a call from a woman who wanted to replace some chairs from a dining set purchased from us in the 1930s. I assured her we could help and sought the assistance of the office manager. "You'll never believe this one, " I told him." I just got a call from a customer who bought some chairs from us in the 1930s. " Before I could finish repeating her request, he interrupted and said, "Don't tell me she hasn't received them yet!"

　　我所工作的精品家具商店是從20世紀(jì)二十年代以來就營業(yè)的。最近我接到一個婦女的電話。她想換一套餐具中的一些椅子。這套餐具她是在三十年代從我們這兒買的。我向她保證說我們可以幫她的忙，于是我向部門經(jīng)理尋求幫助。“你永遠(yuǎn)也不會相信，”我對他說，“我剛接到一個顧客的電話，她在三十年代從我們這里買了一些椅子。” 我還沒來得及說她的要求，經(jīng)理就打斷了我的話：“你別告訴我她到現(xiàn)在還沒收到貨!”

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇4

　　A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."

　　有一個丈夫和妻子都是91歲，他們站在法官面前，要求離婚。“我不明白，”法官說，“你們?yōu)槭裁吹搅诉@把年紀(jì)還要離婚?”丈夫解釋道：“嗯，你是知道的，我們以前是喲等到孩子們都死了。”

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇5

　　A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.The teacher said it was physically1 impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.The little girl stated that a whale swallowed Jonah.Irritated, the teacher reiterated2 that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."

　　一個小女孩和她的老師正在談?wù)撚嘘P(guān)鯨魚的事情。她的老師說：“一頭鯨魚從身體構(gòu)造的角度看，是不可能吞掉一個人的。因?yàn)楸M管鯨魚是一種非常巨大的哺乳動物，可它的嗓子非常小。”那個小女孩說約拿(一位西伯來先知)就是被鯨魚吞掉的。她的老師非常生氣，她再次告訴小女孩說：“從身體構(gòu)造角度來講，鯨魚是不可能吞掉一個人的。”那個小女孩說：“那等我到了天堂，就去問問約拿。”她的老師問：“那么，假如約拿下了地獄怎么辦?”那個小女孩回答：“如果是那樣的話，你就去問他。”

　　
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