冷笑話與傳統(tǒng)的笑話不同，有其獨特的產(chǎn)生和理解方式。下面是學習啦小編帶來的十萬個冷笑話英語版，歡迎閱讀!

　　十萬個冷笑話英語版精選

　　Only One Eye to Settle On

　　The girl found the go-between and said, "You cheated me ! One of his eyes is not true. Why didn't you tell me this before ?"

　　"I have told you. " said the go-between with justice on his side, When you met first, I told you that he settled on you with one eye.

　　Notes:

　　(1) go-between n.媒人

　　(2) settle on選定;決定

　　Exercises:

　　根據(jù)短文判斷下列句子正(T)、(F)：

　?、?The girl was angry with the go-between for having cheated her.

　?、?The girl married the one-eyed man.

　?、?The go-between hadn't told the girl the fact.

　?、?The go-between thought that justice was on his side.

　?、?The girl hadn't fully understood the go-between's words.

　　112.一眼就看中

　　姑娘找到媒人，說：“你欺騙了我。他的一只眼是假眼，你以前為什么不告訴我?”

　　“怎么沒告訴你?”媒人也不甘示弱，“你們第一回見面后，我就說，他一眼就看中你了。”

　　練習參考答案：

　?、賂②T③F④T⑤T

　　十萬個冷笑話英語版閱讀

　　A Short Holiday

　　Alan worked in an office in the city. He worked very hard and really looked forward to his holidays.

　　He usually went to the seaside, but one year he saw an ad in a newspaper "Enjoy country life. Spend a few weeks at Willow Farm. Good food, fresh air, horse riding, walking, fishing. Reasonable prices ."

　　" This sounds like a good idea." he thought, " I' 11 spend a month at Willow Farm. I'll enjoy horse riding, walking and fishing. They'll make a change from sitting by the seaside.

　　Four days later he returned home.

　　"What' s wrong with Willow Farm ?" his friend asked him. " Didn't you enjoy country life ?"

　　"Country life was fine," Alan said." But there was another problem.

　　"Oh, what?"

　　Well, the first day I was there a sheep died, and we had roast lamb for dinner.

　　揊resh meat is the best.擾"I know, but on the second day a cow died, and we had roast beef for dinner. "

　　"Lucky you!"

　　"You don't understand," Alan said." On the third day a pig died and we had roast pork for dinner."

　　" A different roast every day." Jack exclaimed.

　　"Let me finish," Alan said." On the fourth day the farmer died and I didn't dare stay for dinner!"

　　Notes:

　　(1) look forward to期待

　　(2) reasonable adj.合理的

　　Exercises:

　　根據(jù)短文選擇正確答案：

　　① Where did Alan work?

　　A. on a farm

　　B. in a government

　　C. in a restaurant

　　D. in an office in the city

　?、?Where did Alan usually go to spend his holiday?

　　A. the seaside

　　B. the countryside

　　C. the mountains

　　D. an island

　?、?Why did Alan decide to spend his holiday at Willow farm?

　　A. Because he was there.

　　B. Because he had a good friend there.

　　C. Because he thought it would make a change from sitting by the seaside.

　　D. Because he wanted to enjoy the fresh air in the countryside.

　　④ How many days later did he return?

　　A. a few weeks

　　B. a week

　　C. three days

　　D. four days

　?、?What made Alan return so soon?

　　A. He felt sick.

　　B. The air there was not fresh.

　　C. The prices were too high.

　　D. They always had the thing that had just died for dinner

　　113.短期假日

　　亞倫在一個城市的公司工作。他十分努力地工作，期望著休假。

　　以前休假，他經(jīng)常去海邊。但有一年，他看到報紙上有一則廣告：“領(lǐng)略鄉(xiāng)村生活。在唯利屋農(nóng)場度假數(shù)周，可享受：美味佳肴、新鮮空氣、騎馬、散步、垂釣。價格合理。”

　　“這到是個好主意，”他想，“我要在唯利屋過上一個月，去享受騎馬的樂趣，還要去散步、釣魚。這肯定與坐在海邊不同。”

　　四天后，他回來了。

　　“唯利屋發(fā)生什么事了?”他的朋友問他，“你不喜歡那里的鄉(xiāng)村生活嗎?”

　　“鄉(xiāng)村生活是很好，”亞倫說，“但是有一個問題。”

　　“什么?”

　　“第一天，一只羊死了。我們的飯是烤羊肉。”

　　“新鮮肉最好。”

　　“我知道，但是第二天，一只牛死了。于是我們吃的是烤牛肉。”

　　“你真是幸運。”

　　“你不知道，”亞倫說，“第三天，一頭豬死了。我們就吃烤豬肉。”

　　“每天吃不同的燒烤。”

　　“讓我說完，”亞倫說，“第四天，農(nóng)場主死了。我不敢呆在那里吃飯了。”

　　練習參考答案：

　?、貲②A③C④D⑤D

　　十萬個冷笑話英語版學習

　　A Womans answer

　　A husband said to his wife, " Why did God create women to be beautiful but foolish?"

　　"Well," his wife answered at once." The reason is very simple. God made us beautiful so men would love us; God made us foolish so we would marry them."

　　Notes:

　　(1) create v.創(chuàng)造

　　(2) foolish adj.愚蠢的

　　Exercises:

　　根據(jù)短文回答下列問題：

　?、?Who were talking to each other?

　?、?What question did the husband raise?

　　③ The wife thought for a while before she answered, didn't she?

　?、?How did the wife think of the reason?

　?、?How did she answer the question?

　　114.婦女的回答

　　一位丈夫?qū)λ钠拮诱f：“為什么上帝把婦女創(chuàng)造得如此美麗卻又愚蠢呢?”

　　“噢，”他的妻子立刻回答道，“原因很簡單。上帝使我們?nèi)绱嗣利?，男人才會愛我們。上帝使我們?nèi)绱擞薮?，我們才會嫁給他們。”

　　練習參考答案：

　?、?A husband and his wife.

　?、?He asked why God create women to be beautiful but foolish.

　?、?No. She answered at once.

　　④ Very simple.

　?、?She said that God made women beautiful so men would love them; God made women foolish so they would men.