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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語(yǔ) > 英語(yǔ)閱讀 > 英語(yǔ)笑話 > 簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話大全

簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話大全

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話大全

  英語(yǔ)民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛(ài)的民間敘事類(lèi)型,材料豐富,有廣泛的現(xiàn)實(shí)基礎(chǔ)。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話,歡迎閱讀!

  簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話:Tom's excuse 湯姆的借口

  Teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?

  Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, School-Go Slow.

  老師:湯姆,您為什么每天上學(xué)遲到?

  湯姆:我每次路過(guò)拐角,一個(gè)路標(biāo)上面寫(xiě)著:學(xué)校----慢行。

  簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話:A Present

  Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?

  Mom: No, Honey, what?

  Kate: A nice teapot.

  Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.

  Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.

  凱特:媽媽?zhuān)阒牢乙o你一件什么生日禮物嗎?

  媽媽?zhuān)翰恢?,寶貝,是什么?

  凱特:一把漂亮的茶壺。

  媽媽?zhuān)嚎墒俏乙呀?jīng)有一把漂亮的茶壺了呀。

  凱特:不,你沒(méi)有了。我剛剛把它給摔了。

  簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話:A Useful Way

  Father: Jack, why do you drink so much water?

  Jack: I have just had an apple, Dad.

  Father: What's that got to do with it?

  Jack: I forgot to wash the apple.

  爸爸:杰克,你干嘛喝這么多水呀?

  杰克:我剛才吃了個(gè)蘋(píng)果,爸爸。

  爸爸:可是這跟喝水有什么關(guān)系呢?

  杰克:我忘了洗蘋(píng)果呀。

  簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話:Two Cows

  A farmer had a brown cow and a white cow, and he wanted to get them bred, so he borrowed his neighbor's bull and turned it loose in the pasture.

  He told his son to watch and tell him when the bull was finished.

  After a while the boy came into the living room where his father was talking to some friends.

  "Say, Pop", said the boy.

  "Yes", replied the father.

  "The bull has just screwed the brown cow!".

  There was a sudden silence in the conversation. The father asked his friends to excuse him for a moment, took his son outside and said:

  "Son, you musn't use language like that, especially in front of company. You should say that the bull 'surprised' the cow. now go and watch and tell me when the bull 'surprises' the white cow".

  The father went back inside the house.

  After a while the boy came back and said "Hey, Daddy!".

  "Yes, son, did the bull 'surprise' the white cow"?

  "He sure did, Pop! he screwed the brown cow again!"

  簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話:Legs In The Air

  Little Johnny came home from school to see the families pet rooster dead in the front yard. Rigormortis had set in and it was flat on its back with its legs in the air. When his Dad came home Johnny said, "Dad our roosters dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Why is his legs sticking in the air?"

  His father thinking quickly said, "Son, that's so God can reach down from the clouds and lift the rooster straight up to heaven."

  "Gee Dad that's great," said little Johnny. A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Johnny rushed out to meet him yelling, "Dad, Dad we almost lost Mom today!"

  "What do you mean?" said Dad.

  "Well Dad, I got home from school early today and went up to your bedroom and there was Mom flat on her back with her legs in the air screaming, "Jesus I'm coming, I'm coming" If it hadn't of been for Uncle George holding her down we'd have lost her for sure!"

  
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