關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑
關(guān)于英語(yǔ)簡(jiǎn)短笑話大全爆笑
民間笑話是一種頗受人們喜愛的民間敘事類型,材料豐富,有廣泛的現(xiàn)實(shí)基礎(chǔ)。小編精心收集了關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇1
Liar,Liar
騙子，騙子
A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing.
老婆與隔壁鄰居到警察局報(bào)案 說(shuō)她的老公失蹤了。
The policeman asked her for a description.
警察要求，她形容一下。
She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children."
她說(shuō)：“他三十五歲，六尺四寸，黑眼睛，波浪狀的深色頭發(fā);體格健壯，體重185磅，說(shuō)話很輕，而且對(duì)小孩子很好。”
The next-door neighbor protested,
隔壁鄰居期提出反駁說(shuō)：
"Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children."
“你老公五尺四寸，胖嘟嘟 的，禿頭，有一個(gè)太嘴巴，而且對(duì)你的小孩很刻薄。”
The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?"
老婆回答說(shuō)：“你說(shuō)對(duì)了，可是誰(shuí)會(huì)要 這種沒用的廢物 回來(lái)呀?”
關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇2
黑人英語(yǔ)
The black couple already had eight children, and Lula May was pregnantwith her ninth. Finally she convinced her husband to get a vasectomy.
一對(duì)黑人夫婦已有八個(gè)小孩，而魯拉·梅又懷了第九個(gè)小孩,最后她說(shuō)服了她先生去做男性絕育手術(shù)。
On the morning of the operation, she was surprised to see her husbandputting on a tuxedo and getting into a limousine for the short ride to thehospital.
手術(shù)的早晨，她驚訝地看見她老公穿著禮服，乘坐一輛禮車到不遠(yuǎn)的醫(yī)院去。
"Say, honey, what's all this about?" asked Lula May.
"親愛的，這是怎么一回事啊?魯拉·梅問道。"
"Baby, if you gonna be important, you gotta look important.
"寶貝，如果你想當(dāng)名大人物的話，就要讓人一看就知道你很重要!"
關(guān)于簡(jiǎn)短爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇3
財(cái)政學(xué)的一課
Smith was the manager of a construction company and was taking bids on a new project. Thefirst bidder was a Polish company, and their representative offered to do the job for $ 400,000. "That seems reasonable," said Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown on that?"
史密斯是一家建設(shè)公司的經(jīng)理，他正負(fù)責(zé)一個(gè)新工程的招標(biāo)案。第一位投標(biāo)的是一家波蘭公司，他們的代表出價(jià)四十萬(wàn)元接那個(gè)案子。“似乎很合理，”史密斯說(shuō)。“你可不可以給我一張明細(xì)表呢?”
"Sure," said the Pole, " 0, 000 for labor and $ 200,000 for materials. "
“當(dāng)然沒問題，”波蘭公司代表說(shuō)道，“二十萬(wàn)元工資，二十萬(wàn)元材科費(fèi)。”
Next to make a bid was the Standard American Construction Company, which bid $ 800,000.
下一個(gè)出標(biāo)的是美國(guó)標(biāo)準(zhǔn)建設(shè)公司，他們以八十萬(wàn)元競(jìng)標(biāo)。
"Hmm, that seems a bit high," said Smith. "What's the breakdown?"
“嗯，這個(gè)價(jià)錢似乎有些偏高，”史密斯說(shuō)道。"你們有明細(xì)表嗎?"
" $ 400,000 0n materials, $ 400,000 0n labor. "
“四十萬(wàn)元材料，四十萬(wàn)元工資。”
"I'll get back to you. "
“我以后再同你聯(lián)系。”
Finally the representative of Cohen, Goldstein and Leibowitz entered Smith's office. " $ 1,200,000 is our bid," said the agent."
最后可翰•高斯坦•雷伯威茲公司的代表走進(jìn)史密斯辦公室。“一百二十萬(wàn)元是我們競(jìng)標(biāo)的價(jià)碼，”代表說(shuō)道。
200, 0001 That' s way out of line," exclaimed Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown onthat?"
“一百二十萬(wàn)元這個(gè)標(biāo)高得太過分了，”史密斯叫道“你可以給我一張明細(xì)表嗎?"
"No problem," replied the rep. " 0, 000 for me,$ 400 , 000 for you and $ 400，000 for thePolacks.
“沒有問題，”代表回答道。“四十萬(wàn)元給我，四十萬(wàn)元給你，最后四十萬(wàn)元?jiǎng)t給那家波蘭佬開的公司。”
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