下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話，希望對(duì)大家有幫助。

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：I am acting like a lady 我要表現(xiàn)得像一位女士

　　One day women's dresses were on sale at a department store. A dignified middle-aged man decided to pick a dress for his wife, but soon he found himself being battered by frantic women.

　　一天，一家百貨公司的女裝大減價(jià)，一位高貴的中年男士想給他的太太挑選一件女裝。但是，沒過(guò)多久，他就發(fā)現(xiàn)自己已被瘋狂的女人們撞得踉踉蹌蹌。

　　He stood it as long as he could; then, with head lowered and arms flailing, he plowed through the crowd.

　　他竭力地忍耐著。后來(lái)，他低下頭，揮舞雙臂，擠過(guò)人群。

　　"You there!" challenged a thrilling voice. "Can't you act like a gentleman?"

　　“你干嘛?”有人尖聲叫道，“你難道不能表現(xiàn)得像一位紳士嗎?”

　　"Listen," he said. "I have been acting like a gentleman for an hour. From now on, I am acting like a lady."

　　“聽著，”他說(shuō)。“我已經(jīng)像紳士一樣表現(xiàn)了一個(gè)小時(shí)了。從現(xiàn)在起，我要表現(xiàn)得像一位女士。”

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：Good Sight 好視力

　　Lawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the scene of the accident? Just how far can you see clearly?

　　Witness: Well, when I wake up in the morning I see the Sun, and they tell me it's about ninety-three million miles away.

　　律師：你說(shuō)你離事故現(xiàn)場(chǎng)約有35英尺，你能看清多遠(yuǎn)的東西?

　　證人：這么說(shuō)吧，早上起床后我看見太陽(yáng)，別人告訴我這大約有9300萬(wàn)英里遠(yuǎn)。

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：來(lái)信

　　Mr. Henry Beecher entered Plymouth Church one Sunday and found several letters awaiting him. He opened one and found it contained the single word ″Fool″. Quietly and with becoming seriousness he announced to the congregation the fact in these words:

　　″I have known many an instance(實(shí)例) of a man writing a letter and forgetting to sign his name, but this is the only instance I have ever known of a man signing his name and forgetting to write the letter.″

　　一個(gè)星期天,亨利·比切先生到普利茅斯的教堂去,在那里有他的幾封信。他打開其中一封,發(fā)現(xiàn)信中只寫著“傻瓜”兩個(gè)字。

　　他平靜而認(rèn)真地把這件事告訴教友們：“寫信時(shí)忘了簽名的人,我遇到過(guò)很多,但只簽了名卻忘了寫信的人,我還是頭一次遇到。”

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：

　　Customer: Waiter, I can't find any oysters in this oyster stew.

　　Waiter: Well, you wouldn't expect to find any angels in an angel food cake, would you?

　　顧客：服務(wù)員，我這個(gè)牡蠣燉菜里怎么沒有牡蠣?

　　服務(wù)員：是啊，你不會(huì)指望在天使蛋糕里發(fā)現(xiàn)天使吧?

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：玫瑰

　　On the way home one night, I spotted some fresh-cut roses outside a florist's shop. After selecting a dozen and entering the shop, I was greeted by a young saleswoman.

　　Are these for your wife, sir? she asked.

　　Yes, I said.

　　For her birthday? she asked.

　　No, I replied.

　　For your anniversary?

　　No, I said again.

　　As I pocketed my change and headed toward the door, the young woman called out, I hope she forgives you.

　　一天晚上回家的路上，我看到一家花店外面有一些剛剪下來(lái)的玫瑰。我挑了一打，走進(jìn)店里，一個(gè)年輕的女售貨員跟我打了個(gè)招呼。

　　先生，這些是送給你妻子的嗎?她問道。

　　是的，我說(shuō)。

　　她的生日?她問。

　　不是，我回答。

　　你們的結(jié)婚紀(jì)念日?

　　不是，我又答道。

　　當(dāng)我將找回的錢裝進(jìn)口袋，朝門口走去時(shí)，那年輕的女人沖我喊道：希望她能原諒你。

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：Part-time Job業(yè)余工作

　　When my son was a hign-school sophomore, he got a part-time job sacking groceries at a supermarket. He came home all smiles.

　　"How was your first day?" I asked.

　　"It was great, Dad," he replied. "I got to talk to some good-looking girls."

　　Since Stephen is not very talkative, I asked, "What did you say to them?"

　　"Do you prefer paper or plastic?"

　　我兒子在一所中學(xué)讀二年級(jí)時(shí)，在一家超級(jí)市場(chǎng)找到了一份包裝商品的業(yè)余工作。他滿面笑容地回到了家。

　　“第一天感覺如何?”我問。

　　“好極了，爸爸。”他答道，“我跟許多漂亮的女孩子講了話。”

　　由于斯蒂芬不善言談，我問道：“你跟他們說(shuō)了些什么?”

　　“你是喜歡紙包裝還是塑料包裝?”

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：Who Discovered Australia?誰(shuí)發(fā)現(xiàn)了澳大利亞?

　　Teacher: Find Australia on the map for me, Johnny.

　　Johnny: It's there, sir.

　　Teacher: That's right. Now Sammy, who discovered Australia?

　　Sammy: Johnny, sir.

　　老師：約翰尼，在地圖上給我找出澳大利亞在什么地方。

　　約翰尼：先生，在這兒。

　　老師：對(duì)了。薩默，你來(lái)回答我是誰(shuí)發(fā)現(xiàn)了澳大利亞?

　　薩默：先生，是約翰尼。

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：小女孩的愿望

　　On the way home after watching a ballet performance, the kindergarten teacher asked her students what they thought of it. The smallest girl in the class said she wished the dancers were taller so that they would not have to stand on their toes all the time.

　　在觀看完芭蕾舞表演回家的路上，幼兒園老師問學(xué)生的觀后感。班上最小的女孩說(shuō)，她希望舞蹈演員可以長(zhǎng)得更高一點(diǎn)兒，那么他們就不用整天踮著腳尖了。

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：狗也知道這個(gè)諺語(yǔ)嗎?

　　The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.

　　"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"

　　"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

　　一個(gè)小男孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。

　　“沒有關(guān)系，”一位先生“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道嗎?”

　　不是我的錯(cuò)

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：It's not my fault

　　Mother (reprimanding訓(xùn)斥，譴責(zé) her small daughter): You mustn't pull the cat's tail.

　　Daughter: I'm only holding it, Mom. The cat's doing the pulling.

　　不是我的錯(cuò)

　　媽媽(正教訓(xùn)她的女兒)：你不該拽貓的尾巴。

　　女兒：媽，我只是握著貓尾巴，它自己在拽。

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：父親在哪?

　　Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.

　　"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"

　　"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"

　　The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."

　　兄弟倆在看一些漂亮的油畫。

　　“看，”哥哥說(shuō)，“這些畫多漂亮呀!”

　　“是啊，”弟弟說(shuō)道，“可是在所有這些畫中，只有媽媽和孩子。那爸爸去哪兒了呢?”

　　哥哥想了一會(huì)兒，然后解釋道：“很明顯，他當(dāng)時(shí)正在畫這些畫唄。”

　　三年級(jí)英語(yǔ)小笑話：兩塊蛋糕

　　Two Pieces of Cake

　　Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?

　　Mom: Certainly -- take this piece and cut it two!

　　兩塊蛋糕

　　湯姆：媽媽，我可以吃兩塊蛋糕嗎?

　　媽媽：當(dāng)然可以----拿這塊蛋糕把它切成兩塊吧!