適合初中學生英語笑話
適合初中學生英語笑話
前蘇聯(lián)著名作家高爾基說過,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調(diào)劑品”。本文是適合初中學生英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
適合初中學生英語笑話：The Lion and The Ass
A lion and an ass set up as partners and went a-hunting together. In course of time they came to a cave in which there were a number of wild goats. The lion took up his stand at the mouth of the cave, and waited for them to come out; while the ass went inside andbrayed(驢叫) for all he was worth in order to frighten them out into the open.
The lion struck them down one by one as they appeared; and when the cave was empty the ass came out and said, "Well, I scared them pretty well, didn't I?" "I should think you did," said the Lion, "if I hadn't known you were an ass, I should have turned and run myself."
適合初中學生英語笑話：A Duck Walks into a Bar
A duck walks into a bar and asks: "Got any Bread?"
Barman says: "No."
Duck says: "Got any bread?"
Barman says: "No."
Duck says: "Got any bread?"
Barman says: "No, we have no bread."
Duck says: "Got any bread?"
Barman says: "No, we haven't got any bread!"
Duck says: "Got any bread?"
Barman says: "No, are you deaf?! We haven't got any bread, and if you ask me again and I'll nail your dang beak to the bar you irritating dang duck!"
Duck says: "Got any nails?"
Barman says: "No"
Duck says: "Got any bread?
適合初中學生英語笑話：I've Just Bitten My Tongue
"Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother. "Yes, dear," she replied, "Why do you ask?" "Cause I've just bitten my tongue! "
“我們有毒嗎?”一個年幼的蛇問它的母親。 “是的，親愛的，”她回答說，“你問這個干什么?” “因為我剛剛咬破自己的舌頭。”
適合初中學生英語笑話：A Bear and a Rabbit in the Woods
A bear is chasing a rabbit through a forest. They find a bottle and decide to rub it.
A genie pops out. He says "I will grant each of you three wishes.
"The bear says "I wish all the bears in the forest were females." *poof* It's done.
The rabbit says "I wish for a motorcycle." *poof* It's done.
The bear says "I wish all the bears in this country were females." *poof* It's done.
The rabbit says "I wish for a lifetime supply of carrots back at my house." *poof* It's done.
The bear is thinking to himself "why is the rabbit wasting his wishes on stupid small things? oh well." "And for my third wish, I wish that all the bears in the world were female." *poof* It's done.
The rabbit says "For MY last wish, I want the bear to be gay." And he rides off on his motorcycle.
適合初中學生英語笑話：The Greatest Baseball Player Ever
A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "You can't bring that dog in here."
"You don't understand," says the man. "This is no regular dog, he can talk."
"Listen, pal," says the bartender. "If that dog can talk, I'll give you a hundred bucks."
The man puts the dog on a stool, and asks him, "What's on top of a house?"
"Roof!"
"Right. And what's on the outside of a tree?"
"Bark!"
"And who's the greatest baseball player of all time?"
"Ruth!"
"I guess you've heard enough," says the man. "I'll take the hundred in twenties."
The bartender is furious. "Listen, pal," he says, "get out of here before I belt you."
As soon as they're on the street, the dog turns to the man and says, "Do you think I should have said 'DiMaggio'?"
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